Ejaculation Control Begins With This Decision
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One of the most important – and most overlooked – aspects of ejaculation control is mental. Learning to control your ejaculation requires a firm mental commitment to yourself.
If, before you have sex, you do not make the mental commitment to hold onto your ejaculation – no matter what – then there is little to no chance of you doing so during intercourse.
When every cell in your body is screaming at you to release, gnawing relentlessly at your private parts, trying to convince you that ejaculation is just what you need at the moment, promising to relieve you of this torturous pleasure, you must have 100% of your mental determination to hold onto your ejaculate if you are to succeed.
The 3 Pillars of Ejaculation Control
The mental aspect of ejaculation control is by far more important than the physiological. As men, we want to take action: do exercises! Build muscle! Perfect the physical manipulation required to hold off.
In order to control your ejaculation, to prevent ejaculation, to increase the time before you ejaculate, to push your edge, expand your capabilities, you must, must, MUST make the decision to hold off.
Must. Without the decision, you do have a snowball’s chance in hell. Because even with it, you will start bargaining with yourself, making deals with yourself, trying to convince yourself that it is actually a great idea to cum right now, although it’s been less than two minutes inside of her.
Believe it or not, every ejaculation you release is preceded by a subtle, often subconscious choice to release.
If you do not believe me, then watch yourself, listen to yourself, and hear yourself say something like this before you ejaculate:
It’s too difficult right now – bam, you let it go!
I’m too sensitive today – bam!
I’ll wait until next time – bam!
It just feels too good – bam!
Fuck it, I’m going – bam!
I just can’t do it – bam!
Oh what’s the point – bam!
I don’t give a shit – bam!
This is beyond my capability – bam!
I identify, embrace, and accept myself as a lifelong premature ejaculator – bam!
You Can Make Progress
Habitually releasing your ejaculation without attempting to hold off is no different than smoking habitually, or drinking habitually, or lying on the couch and eating potato chips habitually.
To be a lifelong premature ejaculator is to be a lifelong decider to ejaculate, and a lifelong decider against holding off ejaculating, or taking the necessary steps to do so.
I’d like to make something crystal clear: Ejaculation control is something every man who walks the face of the earth must learn to do. Yes! That means you too!
No! You are not the exception to the rule. No! You are not a special case, with an exceptionally sensitive penis. They are all like that, especially when just starting out.
Ejaculation: One of the few things in life that “comes” easy
Yes! Every man must fight, struggle, effort, dig-in, persevere, and push on, push through, push beyond himself, his own limitations, and his own self-indulgence by holding onto his spunk during intercourse – no matter what!
How do I know this? I was a 1-2 minute man, just like you. I spent my 20s and 30s struggling and fighting through, without guide or guidance like you have, but through sheer will and determination.
And you must do the same, because your sex life, your relationships with women, and your personal fulfillment in your life, all depend on it!
These are not small things. They form the very foundation of existence for most men. As such, they are worth fighting for, no?
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Personal Milestone #1: Conscious Ejaculation Release
In my work as a sex and intimacy counsellor, and in my play as a hedonistic gadabout, I have watched many a man just let his ejaculation go without the slightest effort to avoid it.
One man who identified as a “lifelong premature ejaculatory” would stick his penis in his wife and pump, pump, pump, ejaculate. “Aaawwww. Shit,” was his response. Something he said to his wife every time they had “intercourse.” Poor woman.
But I cannot be there to step in for every man whose wife is being denied a proper fuck, because her husband does not make an effort. I watched him: Not once in the three minutes he was inside of her did he slow, stop, pull out, breathe, change position, or do anything other than pump until ejaculation, and then apologize.
I ask you this: Why? Why do you not take these necessary steps to avoid ejaculation?
The First Personal Milestone on the road to greater ejaculation control is when you have made many decisions to hold off during your sexual experience; have taken whatever steps are necessary to avoid ejaculation – no matter what! – and are finally ready to make the conscious decision to release your ejaculation because your personal objectives (whatever they may be) have been met.
This means you are making the conscious decision to release because the time is right, rather than because you are giving up, giving in, giving over.
As you begin to stick to your decision and take the defensive steps necessary to avoid ejaculation, and take responsibility for your own sexual response, you will also slip up, and ejaculate involuntarily.
There is all the difference in the world between pulling out to avoid ejaculation, but not making it, and doing nothing, other than letting it go.
A Personal Challenge
The road to greater ejaculation control is stained with the semen of unintentional release. This is to be expected. No one ever bats 1,000, so do not expect to.
After all, a man’s reach must go beyond his grasp, otherwise how will he go ever-higher?
Learning ejaculation control requires challenging yourself, exploring the edge of your potential, and then choosing to go beyond that edge, beyond yourself to where you have never been before.
The rewards for doing so are rich beyond compare. This is the road to non-ejaculatory orgasms, which do not deplete your sexual energy, and allow you to have an erection all night, or all weekend, if you so choose.
This is also the road to her sexual satisfaction, which requires the full presence of your sexual energy, hard cock, and enthusiastic sexual desire, hunger, need and want for her.
Now I ask you, have you made your commitment to holding off?
I know you have.
