What You Need to Understand About Kegels and Ejaculation Control
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As men we like to take action.
When dealing with something like ejaculation control and premature ejaculation, doing Kegel exercises makes us feel like we are actively pursuing our goals, tackling this problem head-on, taking the bull by the horns, getting this shit done!
There is great satisfaction in feeling like we are doing something tangible and active to help our situation.
Unfortunately, doing Kegel exercises will only take you so far in your quest for ejaculation control.
You can no more do facial exercises in an attempt to stave off a sneeze, as you can do Kegels to stave off the involuntary muscle contractions of ejaculation.
As an 18 year-old with severe ejaculation control issues (1.5 – 2 minute man), I did Kegels all day long, building my bulbospongiosus muscle to Herculean strength. I was determined to hold off those contractions and bulldoze my way through them!
I, like you, finally realized ejaculation control was not a matter of getting so strong I could overpower the contractions. Not going to happen. Not to Hercules, not to you.
Explore Your Own Physiology
The most important benefit of Kegel exercises is gaining an understanding of your own physiology: learning to identify what is going on, with which muscles doing what kinds of pulling/pushing, all the way through the process of getting excited, until arriving at the final point of no return (PONR) and ejaculation.
Yes, some men will need a little help in learning to squeeze those muscles, possibly awakening them and giving them more flex, but mostly you are learning identify them, and then to gain control of their contracting and releasing before the PONR.
However learning to control these muscles is not enough to stop yourself from going over the PONR. You must take further action by using control-enhancing movements of your penis during intercourse.
Proper fucking means you control the rate, velocity, and depth of your pumping action to facilitate, aid and abet control over your ejaculation: slowing, stopping, pulling out, dancing a jig around the room BEFORE you get to the PONR. Whatever it takes!
You will never be able to relax or clench your way out of the PONR. Once you hit that point, you have jumped out of the airplane and are now hurtling your way toward earth whether you like it or not.
You will be able to dampen your trigger so that it is no longer hairpin-sensitive. You will learn to gain some space, some give, some leeway so that it doesn’t go off with the slightest touch.
In fact you will get so good that you can fire at will, or take an all-day walk through a hiking trail with gun in hand, and still have it fully loaded.
Learning to Fine-Tune Ejaculation Control
Ejaculation control, therefore, is a mixture of learning how your own physiology works, and then strategically clenching and relaxing your pelvic floor in conjunction with your penis movements, with the unified goal being to remain safely away from your PONR.
At first, anyhow. While you are struggling for control, you never explore the outer reaches of your edge.
Once you do gain some control of your ejaculation (usually within weeks) and some space to breathe, having begun your journey toward the Magical 20-Minute Mark in earnest, at that point you can begin to test your ability to push your edge further and further away by allowing yourself to get closer and closer to it.
This is the lifelong practise you have adopted: testing your edge, pushing it a little further, getting a little better, steadily and steadfastly making your way toward multi-orgasmia.
Remember: if you are going to risk playing with your edge, and you must, as it is part of the process of gaining space from it, and pushing it further away, then you will also fall over that edge without meaning to.
This is as much a part of the process as striking out is part of baseball. But I assure you, ejaculation control is much easier than hitting a baseball, and you will have a considerably better success rate!
You are not to beat yourself up about falling off the edge, or use it as proof of your lack of ability. In fact as you consciously venture out to test your outer edge, losing it is just as much a demonstration of your moving up the ladder and gaining more control over your ejaculation, as it is the opposite.
When you find yourself hurtling toward the land of ejaculation, please do your best to enjoy the ride. The landing is much more pleasurable with ejaculation, than jumping from a plane. Do your best to make it so.
Sexual energy, like hunger, comes back eventually.
Ejaculation control and proper fucking go hand in hand, each one contributing to the betterment of the other.
If you are having regular sex, and/or masturbate regularly, and are familiar with your bulbospongiosus muscle and pelvic floor, then 2-3 weeks maximum of Kegels will be plenty.
Your main goal with Kegels is getting familiar with the pulleys and levers of your own physiology and ejaculatory process. Once this has been accomplished, you can put the Kegels in the closet with the rest of the exercise equipment you no longer use.
